


I Got a Knife and I’m Not Afraid to God Damn Use It

by blueeyedmasterpiece



Category: Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter/Funhaus RPF
Genre: FakeHaus, GTA AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-23
Updated: 2016-01-23
Packaged: 2018-05-15 19:16:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,213
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5796631
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/blueeyedmasterpiece/pseuds/blueeyedmasterpiece
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Or the “Blue thought about Bruce owning a small café he runs on his own and some fuckers think they can just rob his fucking place on a slow day” fic. Fakehaus I guess.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I Got a Knife and I’m Not Afraid to God Damn Use It

Tuesdays were the slow days.

Bruce got used to being on his own for a few hours on Tuesdays, only a stray costumer walking in or a college student there to use his free wifi was the most he got. He used Tuesdays to clean a few things and try to make some new things to put on the list. He had recently thought about hiring someone to help him, the place growing in popularity quicker than Bruce thought.

He cleaned the counter as he thought about opening up applications, a kid who came in really early in the mornings to get coffee and a muffin had asked if he was hiring and Bruce had told him that he hadn’t thought about it. The kid smiled and said he should before he pulled his beanie down more and walked out of the café. He was honestly Bruce’s favorite customer, his dry and goofy humor making Bruce smile.

Bruce was woken from his thoughts as a customer walked through the door, the soft noise of the bell made him look up from cleaning the counter. Bruce waved and the customer waved back, her golden hair shimmering in the sun. She walked up to the counter and looked at the menu above Bruce, scrunching her face in thought.

“What’s good here?”

“I mean, I’d say everything is pretty good, but I’m used to everything by now that it’s all burned on my tongue,” Bruce joked.

The customer laughed and Bruce felt his face get hot. “Alright, then I’ll get your regular. Also one of those muffins, they look really good.”

Bruce nodded and got a cup, getting a marker out of instinct and cursing at himself as he looked at the customer.

“I know this is meaningless, but what’s your name?”

“Elyse,” she said brightly and moved away from the counter to sit somewhere as Bruce made her a coffee.

Bruce made the coffee, and even though the machine was loud, he heard Elyse begin to talk softly. He didn’t want to ease drop, but he snuck away from the coffee machine to listen.

“Yeah, he’s on his own. I don’t understand why you want to rob this place so bad, we’re not going to get a lot of money from it. Adam, I don’t care if he’s hot, this is a cheap steal. 

I know Joel agrees with me, it’s practically worthle…”

Bruce quickly moved back to the machine and felt his hands start to shake, grabbing the edge of the counter as the coffee was finished. He squeezed his eyes shut and tried to calm down, opened his eyes as he felt his heart just beat faster. He grabbed a knife he had laying out and stayed in the kitchen out of fear, his hands still shaking as he stayed where he was. He heard the door open again and he looked at the entryway of the kitchen, backed away farther into the building as he heard people talking.

His name was called and he felt his heart skip a beat, looked around the kitchen for something else that would keep him safe as he heard someone walking around.

“Start putting money in the bag, make sure we don’t miss a bit of it. There should be more in a safe somewhere. Larr, make sure the cameras don’t come back on!”

“I got it covered, don’t fucking worry. Matt says he’s in position. Please deal with the owner Adam!”

“I’m going to, just give me a sec! Elyse!”

“What?!”

“Keep an eye on the doors!”

“Yeah, got it! Give me the easy job…”

“Hey, don’t complain! I let you in this crew, I can kick you out!”

“Actually, Kovic, it was James who let me in, so you can fucking shut it!”

There was a collection of ooh’s and Bruce scrunched his face up in confusion as he heard quick strides head towards him.

“Greene, we’re not here to hurt you!”

“Bullshit!”

Bruce heard a single huffed out laugh and he gripped tighter to the knife in his hand. “We know a lot about you Greene.”

“I’ve got a knife, and I’m not afraid to god damn use it!”

“And I’ve got a gun,” the guy, what Bruce heard was Adam, walked into view, “and I’m not afraid to use it.”

Bruce pressed farther into the corner as Adam took a step, moving the knife in his hand to throw if needed. Adam kept his gun in his right hand and walked with a small limp on his left, like something happened to make him that way. Bruce saw it as a chance and stepped forward as Adam did.

“Kovic!”

“Just wait, he’s cornered! I’ve got him..!”

Bruce took the chance and ran, stabbed Adam in the side as he pushed by on his left. Adam cried out and turned as Bruce ran for the back door, shot three times and nicked Bruce’s arm on the third shot. Bruce stopped in shock as he heard the knife clank to the floor and Adam walk towards him. He felt a strong hand grab the back of his shirt and push him forwards, Bruce going limp in Adam’s grip. He pushed more forcefully and Bruce fell to the ground, feeling Adam’s crew stare at him as he fell.

“What happened?”

“Thought he could get away,” Adam scoffed, “got me in the side. Call Caleb and tell her to get some supplies to send to our base.”

Bruce moved to sit down on the floor and pressed his hand against his arm, his body still shaking from shock. He listened to the crew rummage through things as Elyse watched the door, a muffin in her hand. She took a bite and Bruce stared at her with new found hatred.

“You didn’t pay for that.”

Elyse barked out a laugh and ate the rest of the muffin before throwing the wrapper at Bruce. “It’s okay, I left a tip.”

“We’re done,” one of the crew members said as he finished packing the bag with Bruce’s money, taking the tip jar and dumping it in before zipping up the bag. 

“Kovic, what do we do with Greene?”

Bruce flinched as the room went silent and they all stared at him, Adam stood in front of him with a smile. Bruce watched as Adam’s blood dripped onto the cleaned floor, blood starting to gush from his wound.

“Shoot him.”

Bruce heard a gun cock, and he shut his eyes to ready himself. It took too long and Bruce hated the lingering suspense, waited to have his brains blown out onto the floor. Instead the gun was pressed to his shoulder and they pulled the trigger, Bruce’s ear ringing as white hot pain surged through his body and laid on the floor. He didn’t see the crew leave as curled up into a ball and screamed, opening his eyes to see it go black around the edges. He gasped for air and wanted his body to give up already, pass out from the pain now starting to really fade in. He didn’t notice people file in and try to help, someone call the cops as he bled into the floor.

All he remembered was how god damn slow Tuesdays were.

**Author's Note:**

> Originally posted on tumblr.


End file.
